


i will always lean my heart as close to your soul as i can

by communist_sasuke



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Character Study, Getting Together, Idiots in Love, Love Confessions, M/M, Mutual Pining, POV Uchiha Sasuke, Pining, Sort Of, i overuse the word 'warm', ramen dates because i can, sasuke calls naruto names but in the loving way that he does in canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-25
Updated: 2021-02-25
Packaged: 2021-03-16 00:00:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,335
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29691942
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/communist_sasuke/pseuds/communist_sasuke
Summary: He often wondered if Naruto felt it too. The same fire, the same warmth. Building up inside him until he could barely breathe around it, until it engulfed his lungs and his whole chest was on fire, the smoke seeping off his tongue around the words he'd never dared to say.Sasuke met his eyes, and he was sure he did.
Relationships: Uchiha Sasuke/Uzumaki Naruto
Comments: 5
Kudos: 97
Collections: Extraordinary SNS Fics💕





	i will always lean my heart as close to your soul as i can

**Author's Note:**

> decided to rewatch shippuden and it made me want to get into sasuke's head a bit so... have this

_"Sakura loves you so much, she cries every time she thinks of you."_

Sasuke felt annoyance swirl in his gut at the memory, at Kakashi's words. They'd been harsh, accusing. As if he owed her something for her feelings. He'd told her enough times that he didn't return them, and what more did she want from him?

Well, he _knew_ what she wanted from him. But he definitely didn't owe her that.

Love. What a big word.

Sasuke knew that what Sakura felt for him likely wasn't that—love. An infatuation, at best. An obsession with the person he used to be, at least, the person she used to pretend he was. But she didn't even know him then, not really. There had been a time when he'd considered her a comrade, someone he cared about. A friend, even. But that time was long over. He'd cut his ties with her, quite easily, actually. At least, compared to some...

"I can't believe Kakashi-sensei stole the seat out from under me! I was going to become Hokage next and then I wake up and suddenly _he's_ been instated! What the hell?!"

Ah, yes. Naruto. The one bond that had been the hardest to sever. The one bond he never could. He supposed he'd always known that, though. The only way to remove Naruto from himself would be to remove Naruto from this planet, because Sasuke knew that as long as he lived in a world where Naruto was _there_ , he'd never truly be alone. And that's what he'd wanted, right? What he'd convinced himself he needed? To be completely alone? And he'd tried to make that a reality.

"Are you even listening to me, asshole?"

God, he'd tried.

"...Hn." He replied after a second, pulling his eyes away from Naruto and focusing them on his ramen. He'd never liked ramen. Before he'd left the village, it had always seemed sort of... detestable, to say the least. It really wasn't all that Naruto made it out to be, and while he'd later realized that Naruto only had such a strong connection to the food because Ichiraku's was the only place that ever treated him like a _person_ , Sasuke had never grown fond of the taste. However, he did find slight comfort in it as a genin. It had reminded him of Naruto.

And then he'd left the village. And he hadn't liked ramen anymore.

So, falling back into the familiar habit of sitting in the cramped booth next to Naruto with a bowl of miso in front of him wasn't exactly... easy for Sasuke. Trying to get back into a routine that you'd been avoiding relentlessly for years, trying to get used to the feeling of finally allowing yourself what you'd been denying all this time...

Sasuke glanced back at Naruto.

Maybe it was about more than just the ramen.

Naruto looked to the side and caught his eyes, not hesitating to beam at him. He was like the sun, Sasuke had always thought when they were younger. That thought resurfaced now.

Love. The word felt tiny compared to the feeling in his chest.

There was a pause, and Naruto's smile fell.

"You okay?" He asked, almost tentatively. Sasuke held back the urge to roll his eyes at his friend.

"...I will be, I think." He answered after a moments hesitation. Something that had been warring in Naruto's eyes seemed to fall into a quiet peace when Sasuke met them with his own.

"Good, that's..." Naruto broke their eye contact, smiling down at his ramen in a way that almost looked like it hurt. But not in the bad way, not in the painful way. Sasuke supposed that wasn't too bad, then.

"That's good. I want you to be. Good, I mean." Sasuke couldn't hold back the smile that crept onto his face. The warmth in his chest grew. It always did, in moments like these.

He remembered the times he'd see Naruto before he'd returned to the village. He remembered the way that his eyes, his voice, his words, would awaken something in Sasuke that he thought had been long dead. Something warm, no, not warm—hot. Blazing hot, like a fire burning inside his chest and up his throat and trying to escape out of his mouth—

But he'd clamped his teeth shut every time. When he looked at Naruto now, though, he thought that it wouldn't be so bad if he let the warmth spill out. Just a bit.

"You too." He said, not bothering to hide the smile he knew was on his face when Naruto snapped his head up, giving him a... look. Sasuke smile grew.

Naruto laughed after a second, a light sound that made the fire in his heart burn brighter. And he had to admit that it hurt, it was fire after all, but not in the bad way. Not in the painful way. He thought about Naruto's smile from earlier.

He supposed they always were one in the same.

Naruto's eyes shifted over to his again and it was... warm. The warmth radiating from Naruto's cheeks and from the ramen that Sasuke still hadn't touched and from the air between them, feeling somewhat stuffy inside the tiny shop, and from Sasuke's chest, up his throat, something more like a tickle compared to the burn it used to be, into his mouth, between his teeth—

He opened his mouth.

"Here's the bill, Naruto! Sorry, but you've used up your 'free ramen for saving the world' pass! You are our biggest customer, after all!" Teuchi's voice was loud and boisterous, breaking the fuzzy haze that Sasuke had found himself in. He closed his mouth and the feeling fell back inside him, nestled comfortably next to his heart. Maybe another time.

Naruto (loudly) complained about having to pay for the food he'd _bought_ , which wasn't out of character, but Sasuke could feel the slight strain behind Naruto's tone. Maybe it was about more than just the ramen. 

"Shut up, moron. I'll pay for it." Sasuke said, and it was the most he'd spoken the whole time they'd been there, but Naruto didn't seem to mind.

"Oh! Okay!" He closed his eyes and sat back, a smile on his face. Sasuke rolled his eyes and handed Teuchi the money with a quiet 'thank you for the food', despite the fact that he hadn't eaten at all. Teuchi didn't seem too bothered, and he just nodded before returning to what must be the kitchen area of the tiny shop.

Sasuke looked over at Naruto, who still had his eyes closed, looking as peaceful as ever. The warmth flickered back to life.

He approached him slowly, silently. He inspected Naruto's face but nothing told him that Naruto was aware of his movements. He leaned closer.

It was not until he was practically nose to nose with Naruto that a blond eyebrow twitched, his friend seeming to have _finally_ caught on. He didn't open his eyes though.

Hm. Interesting.

Sasuke reached up and pinched Naruto's cheek harshly, and Naruto squawked, his eyes flying open as he fell backwards off the stool, cursing Sasuke loudly. Sasuke just laughed, unable to stop it from bubbling up and over. Some of the warmth was able to escape, that way.

And Naruto... Naruto went quiet. Sasuke opened one eye to see why, and he paused when he saw the smile on Naruto's face. The warmth in Naruto's heart must've been brimming, too.

"Some ninja you are," Sasuke snorted, and Naruto jumped to his feet, clearly back in attack mode, yelling some more at Sasuke, for good measure. But even if he couldn't see the warm smile on Naruto's face (he could), the look in his eye would've been enough for Sasuke.

Love.

The word had been echoing around in Sasuke head for a long time, but he'd only just accepted it recently. At the valley of the end, as he lay dying next to Naruto.

_"Why do all of this, go such lengths, for me?"_

_"Don't make me repeat myself!"_

The word had wanted to escape then. Instead, a tear escaped in its place. 

He often wondered if Naruto felt it too. The same fire, the same warmth. Building up inside him until he could barely breathe around it, until it engulfed his lungs and his whole chest was on fire, the smoke seeping off his tongue when he said things like—

_"It hurts me. It hurts me so bad that I can't just leave you alone."_

Sasuke met his eyes, and he was sure he did.

"Sasuke—" Naruto spoke up suddenly, tone serious. For one electrifying moment, Sasuke wondered if this was _it_.

But then Naruto's eyes dropped from his, and the moment had passed before Sasuke had even had the chance to fully register it.

"Let's get out of here, idiot." Sasuke said, breaking the silence that had fallen between them. It was beginning to grow cold, with how badly they'd both repressed their fires. 

He walked over to where Naruto was still on the ground, reaching a hand—his only hand—out to Naruto, who didn't hesitate to grab it, hoisting himself up as that smile returned.

Sasuke liked to think his hand lingered for a moment.

"Wanna spar?" Naruto asked, turning to walk toward the training ground without waiting for a response. Sasuke rolled his eyes at his friend's back.

"We just ate, Naruto. Seriously, do you do anything _other_ than train?" Sasuke said, but he fell into step with Naruto anyway. Naruto whined out some sort of deflection that Sasuke didn't feel the need to reply to, and they continued on in comfortable silence.

He liked this... new side to Naruto. The quiet, softer side. Sasuke never really got to see much of it, not since they were really young, when he'd snuck side glances at Naruto, when he'd watched him.

Naruto had been quiet back then, too. But in the sad type of way that made your heart clench and made you want to look away. 

Sasuke's eyes fell onto Naruto's face as they walked. This type of quiet was different, though. More subdued. As if Naruto was at peace. As if he was exactly where he was—

Naruto turned his head and met Sasuke's eyes.

—supposed to be.

"I love you."

He hadn't even felt the warmth burning it's way steadily up his throat this time, but suddenly the words were in his mouth, and then suddenly they weren't. But instead of being swallowed down, they'd tumbled right past his lips, into the air between him and the one person he couldn't live without.

Naruto stopped in his tracks, and Sasuke was hit with the sudden realization that this was _real_. He stopped too, just a pace ahead of Naruto. But he didn't look back. Instead he stood stock still, waiting, waiting, _waiting_ —

"Sasuke..." Sasuke knew that tone. And the warmth was scorching again. He couldn't look back.

"Sasuke, hey, look at me—" Pity. It was pity. Naruto pitied him for this. Maybe this was how Sakura had felt. His gut twisted. The fire burned hotter. 

(It was painful now.)

But... Naruto felt that same. He must, he _must_. Sasuke had been so sure. Naruto had told him that he ached when Sasuke ached, that he cried when Sasuke cried, that he _felt his pain,_ too. That's just... how they were. How they always were. Two halves, who kept failing to find their perfect fit. No, maybe more like a puzzle. A puzzle that you'd almost completed, after so long, only to find that the last piece was missing. 

Love. Sasuke had thought that had been the missing piece.

Naruto's hand—his only hand—wrapped around Sasuke's elbow, jolting him back to reality. He was spun around and prepared himself for the wave of heat. Not the warm kind, from earlier, but the more violent, angry kind. He'd seen it coming from Naruto often enough to remember exactly what it felt like.

Sasuke realized then that Naruto _must_ have felt the same way as he did, well, not realized, but remembered. Because Naruto had told him so. He'd poured his heart out for Sasuke to take and Sasuke had seen it. He'd known. He'd lost. And he'd cried.

But Naruto... didn't. He didn't know. And maybe _that_ was the missing piece. Because it was mutual, _it had to be_ , but Naruto wasn't quite... there yet. And Sasuke had pushed him, trying to get him to take that one final step to getting there, but that shove had unintentionally destabilized Naruto, and now he was falling farther back.

He should've just let it be. Should've given Naruto more time. Hell, maybe he should've given up on it entirely, letting Naruto live in blissful ignorance for the rest of his life. Maybe it would've been better that way.

"Sasuke, I—" Naruto started, and Sasuke made the mistake of meeting his eyes, and, and...

Oh. They burned.

They _burned._

"I love you too, asshole. What the fuck?" And after a long pause, _that_ tore a laugh out of Sasuke, because he couldn't have possibly thought up a more Naruto-like response than that one. Naruto froze up for a second, before joining Sasuke in his laughter.

And for someone who always called Naruto a moron, it turned out that Sasuke was the real idiot here. Because he'd seen it in Naruto's eyes, Naruto's smile, felt it in the air, in his chest. It wasn't that Naruto hadn't known, it was that he'd been waiting. _He'd_ been the one waiting for Sasuke. He'd known all along, they both had.

Sasuke finally caught his breath, leaning his head forwards and resting his forehead against Naruto's, because he could. Naruto breathed in a shuddered breath and Sasuke watched with a smile as he let it out in a contented sigh, closing his eyes as he leaned just the tiniest bit closer.

Love. Maybe it was big enough, after all.

**Author's Note:**

> i escaped sns hell for a total of 5 minutes before getting dragged right back down. anyways i hope u enjoyed this!


End file.
